"Missionary"... Can I please be called something else?

Can I please be called something else?
I’ve always wanted to be a missionary. But now that I’m preparing to be a missionary for the next 18 months, I don’t like using that word! When people ask me where I am and what I’m up to, I easily mention that I am caring for my nephews in Madison. But then I say that I have a few weeks left until I leave. Then the question follows, “Where are you going next?”

It’s quite a logical and simple question, to which I say, “Thailand.”

It is at this point that I start to hesitate and speak softly, attempting to hold confidence and humility in my one word response. I might expound with, “I’ll be spending 18 months in Thailand”, as I try to put emphasis on the duration, not the location, hoping they might skip over that part. I know what’s next: “Wow! What are you going to be doing there?!”

            At this point I hate saying it, but it is the only way to tell the truth: “I am going to be a missionary.” Or, I can say, “I’ll be doing mission work.”

            The response is always:

            “Wow, good for you!”

            Or, “What exactly will you be doing?”

            Or, “Who are you going with? Is that Peace Corps? A Christian  group?”

All of these questions throughout the conversation are completely logical and natural, so, why is it difficult to say “missionary”?

Problem #1:

All the pastors, youth ministers and any other religious leaders talk about being missionaries where we’re at, or finding your “mission” in life. It’s like a challenge to each individual.  Christ called the disciples and sent them to spread the Gospel…so, we all have a mission. We can be missionaries here.

I know I delivered such messages in my work at the parish level, I heard it all through high school and college, and I know that all of that is true!

*Sigh* I know, I know, I know…

Problem #2:

I feel like it gives the impression that going to be a missionary overseas is akin to trying to “save the world”, or to attempt to live up to Mother Teresa and the incredible work she started in Calcutta. That’s what I think of every time I think of the word! Or, of Jim Eliot down in Ecuador who died in 1956 as a missionary to the Waodani people. Or, of St. Damian of Molokai who traveled from Belgium to a colony of lepers at Molokai.

I’m none of these, nor am I trying to be! I don’t think it deserves a response of incredulity. I’ll be in a city, living life with the people, trying to be a listening ear and presence of compassion. I want to be more human. I want to live from my heart. Perhaps it’s even selfish of me to go—fulfilling a desire on my heart, trying to form my heart as a young person, seeking to learn about another people so foreign…

I can’t come up with any other words…

What else would I call it, while still telling the truth?

Um… “I am going to live with the poor in Thailand.”

That sounds even more heroic.

How about: “I am going to live in Thailand with no job, no income, and to live with 4 strangers in prayer and service to our neighbors.”

Wow, why not join a convent?

How about, “I am moving to Asia for 18 months to live in a Buddhist neighborhood”.

That makes no sense! Why???

Why is missionary the only word?!

“mission”—

In Latin, “to send” is mitto, miso, missum. I have been sent.

I looked up the word, missionary, to find synonyms: disciple, messenger, follower.

I am a disciple of Christ. I have encountered Him. I am His follower and have asked and searched, and now hear a calling from Him. Thus, I must follow Him where He leads me. I am a messenger as He calls us each who know Him to share the Good News! I am to deliver the message to those I encounter as I live my life.

“-ary”—

a suffix added to a personal noun, meaning “contributing to” or “for the purpose of”…

Contributing to…being sent.

For the purpose of… being sent.

I am a missionary as I am following a call, having been sent, and being a follower of He who calls. Wow—what a way to share my call. Just the word missionary shares that message.

All In.
It is a vocation. (From the Latin, vocare: to call—hence, a calling!). Just as some are called to marriage or a job after college, I am called to be a missionary as a single woman. At least for the next 18 months!

During that time, I believe God will be preparing my heart for my next step. Whether that means a lifetime of mission work overseas, at home, being single, married, or religious… Wow… A lot is up for grabs! I suppose it gives me all the more reason to run as hard and fast as I can to God! Stay FOCUSED on Him and the work He has for me as far as I can see. He’ll take care of the rest.

As Fr. Hirsch told me, “Someday you will speak to a group of young people about this moment in your life. You can say either, ‘I heard God’s call and I jumped in with both feet, giving 100%’, or, ‘I gave God 50%” or ‘I went three quarters of the way in’…This, your story, will change lives. You decide now how that will happen.”